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In a big huge world full of so much more

I am tired of trying so hard to be ... enough. 
It wasn't always this way. When I was little, I knew I was enough. I felt it all the way from my crooked front tooth down to my curly pinky toes. My mom told me I was enough, and I believed her. My dad told me I was enough, and I believed him. My Sunday School teacher told me God said I was enough, and I believed her too.
But somewhere along the way, I stopped believing everyone who poured into me that I was special, that I was beautiful, that I could do anything I set my mind to. I looked around me and everywhere I looked I saw prettier, smarter, friendlier, thinner, better. I saw more athletic, more talented, more popular, more attractive, more, more, more, and still more, until I felt like a tiny little person in a big huge world full of so much more than I could ever be.
And then I started working hard to not be so much less in this world of so much more. I weighed and measured and compared and critiqued until I inched a little cl…

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